The Weekly Mailbag says goodbye to divisions, eats wild game and prepares for schools in Los Angeles.
Hi. I don’t know if any of you knew this, but it’s time for another weekend of B1G football. And this weekend… yeah, that’s not a good list of games. If I’m a TV network employee who had to spend the last week hyping up these confrontations, I’m probably checking myself into rehab. And while B1G likes to serve up stupidity when you least expect it, I’m not exactly holding my breath.
That’s why I put my backup plans in place. I already took MiddleSchoolSpeedReceiver to watch the Minnesota big school girls football title game this morning (Rosemount good girls beat Edina 1-0, much to the kid’s delight), we are been to the always gorgeous Bleu Porte for lunch, stopped by the Guitar Center (now she wants a hot pink glitter Ibanez guitar. It can be bought for Christmas), and is going to an HS football game tonight against another suburb full of cake eaters. Hopefully that will satisfy my football fix for the weekend and I can get through tomorrow with just the radio call because no one should have to go through Minnesota-Nebraska. Just send your donation to my friends who run the Chair-ity and find a way to spend the day. And if you’re not a fan of either team, I’m sure your donation to Team Jack or the University of Minnesota Children’s Hospital will be graciously accepted. And you won’t have to watch your team play tomorrow either.
Good weekend and good wind.
B1G West (and East) have been confirmed for next season, but will likely be gone for 2024. Any positive memories from the division? Something you would like to see happen before he dies? – DtownK
misdreavus79: No and no.
BoilerUp89: I would love to see Purdue and Illinois represent the West in Indianapolis before the beloved West Division dies.
RockyMtnBlue: Unlike Legends and Leaders, we didn’t have a protected crossover. It’s great since we’re not at a disadvantage to winning the division (except, you know, being a considerably lesser program than OSU). I suspect that starting at 24, we’ll be playing OSU every year while everyone else is playing them about half the time. This will come back to piss me off.
Thumpasaurus: You’ll have to wait for me to finish the clip of my Big Ten West Anthem.
HWAHSQB: I will miss everything about the west. He is perfect.
NWM: Yeah, I miss winning twice more than Minnesota ever did.
And now, magnanimously, I let WSR have the last word:
CSR: I would really like to see Minnesota win a division. That would be pretty cool.
Will you miss the divisions?
Yes (I’m a fan of a western team)
No (I’m a fan of an Eastern team)
It doesn’t really matter (I’m an Ohio State fan)
115 voices in total
What is your favorite type of game to eat? Do you have any good recipes? – Free beer tomorrow
misdreavus79: Uh, ostrich? I don’t know, I don’t hunt.
RockyMtnBlue: What Misdreavus said. A friend made some pretty good venison jerky. Let’s go with that.
HWAHSQB: I love rabbits. If they were selling rabbit at Aldi or Hy-Vee I would definitely buy it. Stuffed with sage and garlic and smoked it’s pretty good because it’s cooked on the grill with BBQ sauce.
NWM: Once, while we were there playing Risk in his apartment, a college friend took an elk steak out of the freezer, thawed it, fried it, and ate it without never ask us if we wanted it. It was the most cheeky gesture I have ever seen.
My friends in South Dakota tell me chislic venison is the delicacy I’ve never had and need. And I would love to try it.
CSR: Deer jerky. It’s so good.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to lure Jim O’Neil into my basement? – HistoryChat
misdreavus79: Well, he’s retired, so unless you’re looking to avenge some past trauma, he can’t hurt you anymore.
BoilerUp89: What is it in your basement that compels Jim O’Neil to be drawn there? Wait – I don’t want to know. I feel like that would make me an accessory.
RockyMtnBlue: You don’t want him in your basement, HistoryCat. You want him to work for Illinois. Think bigger!
NWM: A sign that I know I have to hang up for the season is how irrationally angry I am when I just read his name.
It is useless. I will repeat what I said last weekend: if he had any dignity, he would quit. But he doesn’t, and he gets paid, so fuck me. Maybe put up a sign for free birdseed or something.
CSR: I’m so ashamed that people in the North West don’t know that. It’s so simple.
Tell him you have a barrel of amontillado.
Which of the following will be most confusing to USC fans and UCLA when they join B1G in 2025: Getting used to significantly less shitty officiating than what they’re used to in the PAC-12, or trying to acclimate to the environment here at OTE? – Transient Buckeye
misdreavus79: Wow that’s a good question. I’ll go with the latter, from Nebraska, Maryland, and Rutgers fans seem to have acclimatized quite well since their arrival.
BoilerUp89: Being ranked in the top 5, going to West Lafayette against an underperforming Purdue team and suffering their loss.
RockyMtnBlue: They’re going to crumble on officiating that doesn’t call holding in football and doesn’t call fouls in basketball.
NWM: There are no USC basketball fans, so that’s a moot point. I imagine acclimating to the cold will be fun, and we’ll see retaliatory kickoffs in LA if the conference lets them off the hook.
I’m excited and curious to see what kind of USC/UCLA commitment we get, if any. Sadly since SBNation emptied its California cover [/voltage increased] I mean after the dastardly state of California forced them to [/nipple clamps disengage] I don’t know how many there are just within this network alone.
Plus, I’m sure they can get on board with “fuck Michigan.”
CSR: They’ll be amazed to find that we don’t have obviously incompetent referees at B1G. We just have bad references. It will be a fun culture shock. I’m so excited for the first time they’re facing a Quadrangle team and not getting a hold call despite running about 400 yards. Look, I know you saw the hand tug on the back of DE’s shoulder so hard it spun him around. And the referee saw it too. But it doesn’t hold…for reasons.